You Aren’t Broken! A Few Myths About Asexuality

Guest Blog by Jennifer Cornell, MSW intern

Being an Asexual in a hypersexualized world can make a person feel like they are broken from an early age.  While other teenagers are discussing their first sexual encounters, the Asexual can easily say they haven’t found “the one” yet; that person who will make them want to have sex as much as their friends.  The person that will “ignite the flame” and make them become a sexual person like the rest of the world, the person who will make them “normal” and understand what it means to want to be sexual with someone else. 

The truth is 1% of the world’s population is Asexual (AVEN, 2020), and that means there may never be “the one” who “fixes” the lack of sexual attraction or fixes the lack of desire for sex because there is nothing to fix.  As Morticia Addams says, “Normal is an illusion.  What is normal for the spider is chaos for the fly.”  In this world, being sexual is considered the normal but that throws the Asexual into a world of chaos as they question themselves and are questioned by the world around them.

MYTH #1 - Asexuals do not need to be fixed because they are not broken.

There are often well-meaning people, even health-care professionals, who will tell the Asexual they just need to find “the right one”, that person who will make them “change their mind about sex” but someone who is Asexual may very well find “the one”, the person who makes them happy and they want to spend the rest of their life with but this does not mean they want to have sex with them.  We often mix love with sex because to be in love automatically means we have to want to have sex with that perso